another list of “things I’m grateful for”

  1. Antibiotics…my throat has hurt for three days and I am blessed to have a doctor who believes me when I tell him I need them!
  2. Hot apple cider with rum! Good in the morning, afternoon AND at night!
  3. Fleece pajamas- the ONLY way to get comfy on a rainy and cold afternoon.
  4. Cuddling with my honey in the morning under the covers. Wrapping yourself in each other’s arms and legs and nuzzling is the sweetest feeling in the world.
  5.– Ever since my Satellite dish was disconnected I am grateful to watch my favorite shows here!
  6. My trusty 2000 Subaru Forester… 100,000 miles and going strong! Not cool but damn, Suzi Subaru is the best car I ever owned!
  7. My Visa card (the bastard LOVES me, too!)
  8. Bacon- Thank you, pigs!
  9. A daughter who “gets” me.
  10. Used books stores.. Thank you to Rick’s and Houghton Book Store! You let me be able to afford to have books always in reserve. That comforts me SOOO much!
  11. Potatoes–mashed, fried, scalloped, latkes, boiled, gratineed, salad, baked, hash browned, and…drum roll, please…CHIPS!
  12. Warm, enthusiastic, smoochy, clingy, happy hugs from my grandson  Cole EVERY time I come to see him!
  13. Gummy, sweet, and beaming smiles from my 6-month-old grandson Ryan. Oh, and the wonderful way he smells right there on that special spot at the top of his widdle head!
  14. On-line shopping. Better than dealing with the insanity of malls and big box stores.. ANY TIME.
  15. My hair colorist. Jodi, you perform a miracle every 5 weeks!
  16. Sharp cutlery.
  17. Mascara. Black. Always black. Maybelline. Cheap and wonderful!
  18. Orgasms!   Well DUH!
  19. My blogger friends and my Facebook buddies. You know who you are and I love you all!
  20. My darling, handsome, and loving boyfriend, D’Bear.  He’s my best friend and the best playmate a girl could ever ask for.

This is only a partial list of some of the many, many things I am blessed with.

Happy Thanksgiving to you all!!



Merry Christmas

As I sit here at my computer waiting for all my loved ones to arrive safely, I am pondering all my blessings.

You, my blogging friends, are incredibly precious to me. You’ve helped make this past year something bearable and oftentimes, wonderful!

 As some of you know, I filed for divorce from my husband of 33 years back in July. It has been a bitter and sweet time for me, a time for re-learning who I am and for learning to allow myself to be loved again.

 Thank you all for being that comforting presence in my life, that constant warm stream of friendship, laughter, and thoughtfulness. As I look back I realize just how much your friendships have meant to me. Many nights my fears and doubts kept me awake into the wee hours but you all kept me sane and comforted.

Thank you.

And I wish you all a blessed and happy time spent with the ones you love, eating, drinking, dancing, laughing and loving !

Please enjoy this video of my favorite song for the special time that is Christmas.

Merry Christmas

from your friend,   Trisha

Giving Thanks



Things I am grateful for:

  1. My beautiful, intelligent children, all of whom make me so proud to be a mom.
  2. My D’Bear. He IS the love of my life. Who knew I would find that so late in life? I am unbearably awed by it!
  3. Trees. I love trees!
  4. Grandchildren! Three grandsons and one (unknown gender) on the way!!
  5. Fuzzy slippers
  6. My home. I could so easily have walked away from it in the divorce settlement but I didn’t and now I’m glad I held out.
  7. Friends. They are like the blood in my veins. I could never have survived in this world without them.
  8. Starry nights in Pennsylvania. They’re glorious!
  9. Books and the people who write them. Thank you, Authors! You helped me escape many a horror in my life. I am eternally grateful.
  10. My Subaru. 92,000 miles and zipping me along the highways with ease. I love her!
  11. Coffee. Was there ever a time when I didn’t reach for it first thing in the morning? Ahhh, that first hot sip of nectar!..
  12. My country. I wonder how I got so lucky as to have been born when I was into a country that tries so hard to be the kind of place where people can be enjoy freedom and democracy..
  13. Birds. They make me happy.
  14. My body. So far, so good. I am healthy and have the use and function of all my parts. For that I am grateful! (Some parts better than others, but hey..{shrug})
  15. Hot showers!
  16. Ibuprofen
  17. Wine, that glorious concoction that is food and drink all rolled into one.
  18. Buttered toast
  19. Down comforters
  20. Ludovico Einaudi  and his beautiful music.
  21. The Internet. How would I have met all these amazing people without it? I still am amazed that I can know incredible people all over the world and never leave home.  There is so much beauty, talent, creativity, and caring out there in the voices of my dear Internet friends. Hey, it’s how I met my D’Bear!
  22. Fleece
  23. Kitties, puppies, bunnies, all the widdle baby animals. I have an antidote for the Blues: find a litter of puppies and sit on the floor with them for fifteen minutes. It takes all your cares away to be pawed, licked, snuggled, and sniffed by several warm, sweet pups! Guaranteed!
  24. Clean water
  25. Good food. Gawd! I love to eat! And luckily I am a fair cook!
  26. Bread. It deserves its own category! I could happily live on nothing but good bread ( well, with some butter or olive oil thrown in for good measure.)
  27. My new-found sense of “c’est la vie”. I am learning to let go… go with the flow…to sit back and enjoy the ride. It’s so refreshing! I always tried to control everything until recently when I finally realized I couldn’t!
  28. Free time, daydreaming, doing nothing’! I just learned how to do it! Not well, but I’m working on it and I like it! This kinda ties in with number 27.
  29. The teachers who drilled me till I learned to count and multiply and divide until I could do it in my head. Bless them.
  30. My faith that there is more to life than what I see and feel here on this earth and that one day my eyes will see beyond all this to the very heart of everything.


Happy Thanksgiving Day to all of you and may your blessings be many!



I’d Rather Be Thought a Fool


On Friday I was at D’Bear’s house in Rochester while he was at work. I was doing a little straightening and baking some cookies for the get together with the neighbors later when the doorbell rang. I don’t know which door to go to since there is the front door and then there is a side door which everyone who knows D’Bear uses. I went to the front door thinking that’s where a doorbell is most likely located.

A man was walking away by the time I got to the right door. I thought at first he was the UPS man because I could see a UPS truck out by the curb in front of the house next door. This man wasn’t wearing the “Brown” but I asked him if I could help him , thinking he may be a meter reader since I do know they come around to read the gas meters here.

 He turned to me and said “Ma’am,my name is Kenny ******. Lots of people in this neighborhood know me.  Would you like me to rake the leaves from your front yard? I sure could use the work ’cause I have no food for tonight.”

 He was a slender black man of about 40-years old. He appeared clean and quiet and non-threatening. I started to say “No” but only because D’Bear has a leaf blower and that was one of things I had planned to do that day. However when I looked at that face all I could think of was: here is a man asking for help. Not a handout. Just some help.

Now in my community back in Northeast Pennsylvania I seldom see  African-Americans or Asians or even Hispanics. We have a fairly uniform white populace. I have lived there for 27 years. Rochester is much more diversified racially. I have no real prejudices that I know of so this black man didn’t even make a blip on my radar as a man of color, only as a man in need.  I’ve been in situations in my past where the opportunity for any kind of work would have been a lifesaver. The thought of someone going without food even for a night breaks my heart when I am so blessed with food in the refrigerator all the time!

 I asked him how much he wanted to rake the yard and he hesitated only a moment before saying ” $12.00 okay?”

I said “Sure! That would be great. Just ring the bell again when you’re done and I’ll come out and pay you. By the way, are you hungry now?”  “He said “No, ma’am, but some food for later would be much appreciated.”

It was a crisp and chilly day as he began to rake the leaves but he removed his sweatshirt and hung it on the shrubbery along the driveway.  I went back inside and placed some bread, a jar of peanut butter, some grapes, cheese, and a half of a stick of pepperoni I had in a bag along with a plastic container of juice. In about a half an hour he rang the bell and I gave him the money ( I made it $20) and the bag of food. He looked at me and said “You’re gonna make me cry. That is so kind of you. Thank you.”

 I said “It’s my pleasure. You did a great job on the lawn!”  He had! It was clean and all the leaves had been neatly raked to the curb.

 He put his sweatshirt on and walked a little ways and then turned back and smiled at me as he walked on.

 I closed the door just as the phone rang. It was D’Bear. I told him what had just happened and I told him the man’s name, asking D’Bear if he knew of him and he immediately said ” NO! I have never heard of him! WE DON”T do that! That’s dangerous! There have been lots of house invasions in this area lately!! Don’t EVER do that again!”  and he was sort of shouting.

 I said, “Well, I did it. I won’t do it again. But I usually read people well and this man seemed to be no threat. My only stupidity may have been to open the door to a stranger at all!” D’Bear must have taken a moment to think about what I had said because he apologized and said “I trust your instincts. I was just frightened for you AND he could have been casing the place so he could come back and rob us later.”

  Huh?? Ok, maybe I am naive but would a man actually rake your leaves in order to canvas your yard and see if he could break in later? I guess it’s possible but it kinda makes me giggle. “The Yardman Bandit”!  Or the “the Roving Rakeman Robber”!  heeheehee!!

  D’Bear and I have talked about this a lot since Friday. He has since told me that I have a good heart even if I am kinda innocent in the ways of city life, and he feels bad for having shouted and said those things. He even offered to give me the $12 since it was for HIS yard! (I didn’t tell him I made it $20)  We had a long talk about race and the lack of jobs for unskilled workers in the city and about how one goes about being a good neighbor. I think maybe I taught him a lesson in giving and compassion. He taught me to be more cautious about opening the door to strangers. He’s right. But I’m still glad I did.