It would seem that the STBE (Soon-to-be-Ex) is taking me seriously finally!        

  The tree branch has been removed. After some consideration of my options I decided that enough was enough. I called STBE and said that unless he did something about the branch I was going to call the most expensive tree surgeon in the area and have it removed, then bill HIM!

Not only did he come over with a chain saw but he brought two other employees with him. In about 15 minutes the limb was cut up into decent firewood size and the debris was hauled away. Gawd!  Why do I have to go through this crap.

Now some of you may be asking yourselves ” why didn’t she just ask him to cut the limb up?” Well, I did.

He pretended that the limb was news to him, that he had somehow not noticed it when he drove past my house 12 times.  He is very busy, he said. He will “get around to it soon.”  I know his “get around to it soon”.  I asked him three years ago to fix the hole in the woodshed roof.  I ended doing it last year. A shit job, yes, but at least it kept the worst of the snow and rain out.

When I posted images and wrote about this a few days ago I got some brilliant responses about how to handle the situation. Some of the more inspired ones are: “Maybe you could manage to pull it just a little ways… isn’t it only 20 feet or so to the middle of the road? I bet if you could get it that far the rest would take care of itself. “  and ” Hook a chain to it and drag it to one of those assholes driveway.”  Also I got ” Go thru the kids old toys and find anything with wheels; rollerskates, skateboards, wagons etc. Get them under the bulk of the branch and push that puppy into the middle of the street. Giving just enough room for YOU to get in and out of your driveway. “  All inspirations to me!!  But the one that sounded like the most fun was this one :”I say pour some gas on it, set it ablaze and roast some marshmallows.”

I love my readers!

 Now I can just lay my fat ass down on the couch and be a happy bitch! Cause sometimes we all need a nap! Ahhh, if only life was like this……….

Peace, y’all! 






14 comments on “Limb-less

  1. LOL – those were some great suggestions! I’m glad you don’t have to worry about the stupid tree anymore though! 🙂

    Teeni– Me, too!! It was stoopid!!!! 😀

  2. Oh yeah! Hit ’em where it hurts… the wallet, baby! You know what you’re doing.

    Is that a cartoon Canadian with a hard-on? 😕

    Uh…well…. it could be a hard-on. I was thinking more along the lines of it being kinda representational of a woman with more balls than the men she had to deal with. I guess I should be a little more choosy when selecting images, huh? 😕 LMFAO ! (but why do you say Canadian?)

  3. Great to hear!
    Yeah, is that a hardon under that uhh .. dress?

    Thanks, Red! YES… it appears to be a hard-on…… Maybe a bad choice here…. sheesh!! 😀
    Sometimes even I don’t know what I’m thinking.

  4. Now i see why the six pack wouldn’t’ve worked.
    Glad that it’s all done now.
    Threatening people’s pillsbury always does the trick.

    Happy cleared driveway!!!

    OK, c, what the heck is a pillsbury? I’m feeling kinda stoopid today! 😕

  5. Geez, I’ve been meaning to visit here for a while now. And I’m so glad I finally did. I love your blog… and LOVE the pics. LOL

    Hi, SLF! Thanks for popping in and looking around! Thanks for the compliments! (I’ve been lurking at yours, too, and I love what I read there!!)

  6. It’s fixed. That’s the important part. Take your well deserved break.

    I will do that, and the bulldoggy are eating bon-bons and watching reruns of Dr. Who! 😛

  7. Ha ha… Don’t you watch South Park ever? All the Canadians have split heads like that. I thought that was common knowledge. 😀 Your chick with the stiffy looks just like one of them.

    Alas, no. I have not really watched South Park. I am still getting over Beavis & Butthead, thanks to you! hehehehehehehe

  8. Glad it’s taken care of. How the hell can you drive by that monstrous branch and not notice it?? Ex’s are such fucktards! Don’t get me started.

    Hope you had a lovely break…bon bons and all.

    Ex’s are such fucktards”! I think I’m going to have that one printed on a T-shirt!!
    Thanks, friend!!

  9. Bleah!

    Hold his head under the covers and give him a “Dutch oven”



    Ok, Gadfly, I’m gonna assume that a “Dutch oven” is…what?..flatulence under the covers? Never heard that one but I like it!! That won’t happen because that man does NOT get to come in MY bed ever again!! BWAHAHAH!!!! Poor fool………maybe his girlfriend can give him the Dutch Oven treatment!! 😀

  10. Women, we are crafty and do what needs to be done. I commend you girl! Someone up there said it best, hit ‘um where it hurts- the wallet…..

    Glad it’s out of your way!

    Thanks, JQ! Yes, we do what needs to be done. That “someone” was birdpress. She knows her father and what hurts him the most!! Hahahahaha

  11. Pillsbury is dough. Dough is money.
    When you threaten people’s money, it’s breathtaking how quickly they hop to.

    Well, duhhh… I shoulda figured that out..(thumps forehead). Thanks for clearing that up! Yep, you’re sooo right. That is the STBE’s Achilles Heel !!

  12. Hell, glad you got my wit out before you set the thing ablaze 😉
    and personally, I loved the way you handled it. Extortion may be an ugly word but its a damned useful one

    Hey, you don’t live with an Italian from Brooklyn for over thirty years “wid-out knowin’ some ways a’ dealin’ wit dese guys, ya know?” T’anks there, Ozy! I really appreciate that youse are wit me on dis!! 😀

  13. I love it! (and your pics are wickedly cool) Even your Canadian with a ‘stiffy.’ 😀

    Thank you !! I don’t think I’ll ever live down the Canadian with a stiffy………silly me……. 😕

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