I just came back with D. after sitting in his accountant’s waiting room while D. was getting his tax returns prepared. There was a man sitting to my right who immediately started chatting with me. He seemed at first to just be one of those extra-friendly sorts but after a couple of minutes of him rambling on and on ad nauseum about his brilliant and oh-so-successful son I started to shut down. I mean, there’s only so much chitchat I’m willing to put up with from bores. So I picked up a nearby magazine, a four-year-old copy of Family Circle (EGADS!) and started thumbing through it.
This didn’t slow him down. Not at all! If anything it seemed to challenge him to even greater flights of rhetoric and so he started leaning in towards me in order to get more of my attention. “Have you heard about Bush vetoing the next tax rebate?” he says. I pretend to think he’s talking to someone else and I don’t look up or respond. He moved one seat closer to me!
“Guess what I’m doing with my money this year? It’s really driving my wife up the wall. She says’ why do you have to do that’ but I am gonna do it any way.” No response from me. I won’t even look up from the scintillating article on “Seven Secret Tips from the Stars on Ways They Keep Fit”. He says “I am giving all my tax refund money to my grandchildren’s college funds! Yep, that’s me. I am one generous grandpa!”
It’s driving him crazy that I am refusing to respond to him. He gets up and adjusts himself !! He then turns his back to me and bends over to tie his shoes! He sits back down and he starts in once again. I finally had had enough so as soon as he said ” Did I tell you about my crazy wife? She moves my stuff around…” I leaned in towards him, put my finger to my lips and said “SHHHHHhhhh!”
I leaned back in my seat and for about 30 seconds there was a blissful silence as I went back to my magazine.
But he was a tough old bugger. He stood up, walked down the hall, entered the room where D. and his accountant were working and started chatting with the CPA!
I think I’m declaring a day of silence. The sound of my own voice is even getting on my nerves now…