Now I have to figure out how to get my STBE (Soon-to-be-Ex) to buy me out so I can get out of this fishbowl I live in. Here’s the deal: I live in “our” old house on one side of the road, my daughter, her husband, and son live across the street, and my ex has a business diagonally across from me where he spends the better part of the week, along with all our employees. AND since he keeps all the classic cars over there along with storing a couple for his friends, I get to see many of those people, too. Nothing I do goes unnoticed or unremarked upon. If D. comes to spend a few days with me, everyone knows about it.
Not that I give a damn what they think. I just don’t like being on display so much of the time.
I am not the screwing-around party in the marriage. Three years ago my STBE left me , saying that perhaps some time away from each other would be good for us. We had been having problems for a long time. After a couple of weeks we actually were getting along better. He would stop in often and we finally got to the point where we could talk without fighting or bickering. It was good.
Then about two and a half months later he stopped by and said he wanted to tell me something before I heard it from someone else. He said he’d “met someone” and they were “in love“. ……..huh?
I thought we were in the process of repairing our marriage and he MET SOMEONE and THEY’RE IN LOVE?!! WTF????
Oh, and the girlfriend? She’s the recently divorced ex-wife of one of his good friends! And even better? She has the same first name as me! Happy Happy Joy Joy!!!
I later ran into his girlfriend’s ex and he told me my bastard of a husband had been planning on leaving me for years!!
Was I angry? Shit yeah!
Am I still? No, absolutely not. It is over and I am now happier than I’ve been in many years. But the divorce will probably be messy considering we have many assets to divvy up and the STBE is a selfish prick who hides things really well and always has. I have never known, in thirty three years of marriage, how much money he makes a week! I am in the process of trying to figure out just what my half of this marriage is worth, thus the appraisals.
I just started this whole legal battle and already I am tired of it. I wish it would all go away. I just want to be able to spend some time with D. and get on with living the rest of my life as happily as I can. I know I am not much of a fighter. I never have been but this battle may just determine the quality of the rest of my life. I had better be prepared to do whatever is necessary to make sure things get done fairly.
I like my new attorney. He is calm but feisty, someone who speaks quietly but can be as tough as nails if he needs to be for a client. I like that! I feel calmer knowing he’s got my best interests at heart (or checkbook, whatever.)
OK, tomorrow I get to work trying to make this thing go as smoothly and as painlessly as possible.